The Nankipooh Enquirer "Covers the South like Sorghum Syrup"
P. O. Box 1849
Nankipooh, Georgia
Editor in Chief: Colonel Bascomb Biggers
Ace Reporter : Scoop Biggers
DATELINE June12, 2013:
"Listening In"
By: Scoop Biggers
When I was just a kid, growing up on the old farm down in Nankipooh,our first telephone was a party line shared with the Smiths, Cartlidges, and Rogers families, and you knew whose phone was ringing by the number of rings. The Biggers phone was three rings, and the Rogers was four, Smiths two, and the Cartlidges was one.
You had to listen pretty close to hear the number of rings so you didn't answer somebody else's phone, and you couldn't make a call going out if somebody was already on the line. Of course, there were those who listened in on other folk's calls, and since everybody knew each other there were very few secrets kept. As a matter of fact I believe that Grandma Biggers invented the first "Conference Call", since she and Aunt Helen Rogers, and Mrs. Evelyn Smith, and Mrs. Dora Cartlidge used to all get on the phone together every Wednesday at 2 pm to discuss the grocery shopping for the next Thursday. Of course there were very few secrets in those days, but it didn't matter because everybody knew each other. However if you had a piece of news that you did not want spread around, you had best not talk about it on the telephone.
We have come a long ways since those days of the party line, but maybe not as far as we might think. It appears that today we have a lot more to worry about, than having Dora Cartlidge find out that we thought the hat she wore to church last Sunday was kinda funny looking. For instance if you have some criticism of the government, you best not discuss it with your brother on your cell phone, since you might end up on a list somewhere, if your call happens to be one of the billion or so that the government is listening in on.
I did not mind putting up with the party line back in the 50's, but I draw the line at some contractor for the CIA monitoring my political opinions. I believe that if this were put up to a vote, the majority of Americans would agree with me. Back in the day, that would have included Mr. Washington, Mr. Jefferson, and Mr. Franklin. I hesitate to think what Mr. Patrick Henry might have to say about this. Folks, this really doesn't sound like America, does it?
"Just my opinion"
Scoop Biggers
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MAKE FRIED CATFISH THE NATIONAL DINNER!
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